Before everyone could legally bet on every aspect of a football game, fantasy football’s sole purpose was to involve fans in NFL games they would otherwise have no interest in. Heck, I named my team last year after the great Darnay Scott.

A generation ago, the smart fantasy pick was bundling Scott with his QB, Jeff Blake. Were it not for that pair, I would never have watched those Bengals teams. Nobody in the NFL has asked what it would take to grab my attention for more than a few plays at a time. In the last decade or so, I’ve enjoyed watching NFL games where I have no rooting interest when I was in Scottsdale/Phoenix for Autumnal Baseball (since I work with seniors, I avoid saying Fall). and sitting outside at a handful of neighborhood sports bars and with an occasional cigar. For several reasons, those days are long gone. I can’t pretend to care about guys or teams from the NFC South or AFC East.

This year, I was done in by the auto-draft feature in an ESPN league. Even after 317 simulated mock, auto-drafts I got stuck with Drake London of the Falcons. The only thing less interesting than watching the Atlanta Falcons is watching the Atlanta Hawks. If this dude is as highly rated as the AI auto-drafter thinks, someone in my league should have spared me and taken him. Last year, I took part in the draft although none of us was in the same building (let alone a sports bar, I remember when that was the highlight of fantasy football. Because I was in Wisconsin for a Hi-A minor league game, I chose to auto-draft. A friend of mine went that route for the last few rounds of his draft, but he had a legit reason-it was his daughter’s second birthday and he would like to walk her down the aisle someday. I didn’t have that kind of excuse.

At this point I’d trade London for a box or two of toaster pastries and some backup from the Bills. Until I find a nice joint to watch a game or two outside, I’ll be otherwise engaged on Sundays this winter.